How beautiful it is to be known as a man or woman of his or her word. When I was growing up a promise and a hand-shake were all you needed. Contracts were largely foreign and unnecessary. In fact, to insist on one would have been an insult. Why? Because a man’s word was his bond. No one was willing to risk their social capital or relational equity by breaking their word.
But how times have changed. Twice in the last month I have had people blatantly dishonour their own word. Both were under a verbal contract, and both supposedly religious people. Their obligations were explicit. There was no ambiguity. This is tragic — especially for them.
Keeping your word is the essence of integrity. As Stephen Covey points out, “honesty is making your words conform to reality. Integrity is making reality conform to your words.” It is essential to leadership. Without it, you cannot be an effective leader. Why? Integrity is required for trust. If people can’t trust your word, they won’t trust you. Trust is necessary for influence. People choose those they let influence them, and this is based largely on trust.
Yes, keeping your word is sometimes difficult, expensive, and inconvenient. But the cost of not doing so is even more expensive. It will ultimately cost you your leadership. In the Sermon on the Mount, in Matthew 5, Jesus expressly said, ‘Let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.’ Yes, so impactful should be your word, that a written agreement should be a mockery of your integrity, and an evil blot on your character.
Like I said at the beginning, how beautiful to be known as a man or woman of his or her word. And then I said, that it is tragic when someone breaks their word, not only for the person who is the victim, but more so for the person who breaks it, because although he has gained materially from doing so, he has lost what he may never ever regain and which is even more precious than gold or silver and that is his or her reputation.
I know a friend who influenced me in my within a year of his marriage that his wife suffered from a mental incurable illness. Did he divorce her? Did he say that this was not what he dreamt marriage was about? No, now over forty years into his marriage, he looks after her day and night. He might have lost out on a lovely journey of marital companionship, but his keeping to those marital vows, ‘I do’ has influenced dozens and even hundreds, to understand what it is to lead a godly life. How beautiful it would be when we are laid to rest, for people to say, ‘He was a man of his word..!”
