CDA annexes Zanzibar. At home, the plastic bags still float.
Urban Bystander
His Dualness convened the imaginary coordination meeting on one agenda item; Requisition from Stores for receipt books in Tanzanian shillings. The Directorate, Board and Secretariat signed for drafting, approval and notification. His Dualness signed twice, as Chief Commissioner and Chairman. Nobody had brought a copy.
The minutes recorded that notified regulations could not be wrong. Zanzibar was therefore within jurisdiction. An Expeditionary Sanitation Force would be raised. All agreed.
By evening, the CDA Expeditionary Sanitation Force had two compactor trucks, one of which compacted, and six handcarts. Boota arrived from Drainage with his mop. Stores reclassified it as a broom and issued him a helmet.
“Are we going to sea, sir?” Boota asked.
The Commander handed him the Gazette.
The Gazette was real. CDA’s May 2023 solid-waste regulations, S.R.O. 638(I)/2023, contained two Twenty-Twos. The first, within Regulation 3, authorised written sanitation notices. Numbering restarted under Sub-Regulations; the second prohibited plastic bags “in Zanzibar”.
Somewhere between the two Twenty-Twos, the capital had acquired an island.
The penalty schedule set out in Pakistani rupees and arrived, correctly for Zanzibar, in Tanzanian shillings. Entry after entry began at Rs1,000 and ended at 500,000 Tsh.
“Sir,” asked Boota, “do we go there, or does it come here?”
“Both,” said the Commander. “In phases.”
By morning, Islamabad’s map had acquired a blue coastline. Rawalpindi had been reclassified as territorial waters. The Foreign Office sought clarification. Zanzibar’s government had banned thin plastic bags in 2006; its City Council now asked whether annexation included rubbish collection. Defence reported no troop movement.
Barkat Contractor had been unseen since notification. The Commander considered that suspicious enough to warrant a search. His men searched green belts, nullahs and the rubbish heap behind the market, but not the regulations. Nobody went in there.
By noon, the release was waiting. Barkat was not.
The Commander spotted Boota’s duty roster in a polythene sleeve.
“Possession,” he said.
“Stores gave it to me, sir.”
The Commander warned him. A minute later, the roster was still in its sleeve. He declared a second offence, fined Boota 500,000 Tsh and took a photograph.
“Fine imposed,” said the draft release. “Regulations strictly enforced.”
“Sir,” asked Boota, “where does one buy Tanzanian shillings?”
Then he pointed at the heap. “And that, sir?”
“That is a service matter. We are conducting enforcement.”
Boota pocketed the ticket.
The press release needed a regulation number. The Commander ordered his men into the Gazette, between the second Twenty-Two and Twenty-Three.
A charpoy blocked the passage.
Barkat lay on it reading an old tender notice. Seeing uniforms, he folded the paper and made room. Nobody sat down.
The Commander booked him for unauthorised occupation of a notified provision.
At the hearing, the Special Magistrate asked Barkat for his address.
“Between Twenty-Two and Twenty-Three, Your Honour.”
“Since when?”
“Since notification. Twenty-Two puts the offence in Zanzibar. Twenty-Three says ‘fine of’ and leaves out the amount. I lived in the nothing.”
“Did nobody come looking?”
“Not even the drafters, Your Honour. Had they read it, they would have found me on the first day. Zanzibar too.”
The court reader returned, finger still on the page.
“There is an island in there, sir. And a mayor.”
The Magistrate found up to six months’ imprisonment in the regulations, up to two years in the Sub-Regulations and a “fine of” without an amount.
The Commander rose. “Surely Your Honour can see what the Authority meant.”
“I can see what it printed,” said the Magistrate. “That is what you brought me.”
The court reader found a requirement for monthly website reports on violations and fines imposed and recovered.
“Where are the reports?” the Magistrate asked.
“The regulations provide for their publication,” said the Commander. “I asked for the reports.”
The Commander requested time to obtain them.
The Magistrate sentenced Barkat Contractor to a fine of.
The Magistrate showed the clerk the blank after “of”. The clerk looked at the box marked Amount paid.
“Will you be needing a receipt?” he asked.
“Two copies,” said Barkat. “One for Accounts.”
Outside, the Force declared success. The Foreign Office was still studying the map.
A plastic bag had blown against the market railing. Boota picked it up, placed it on his handcart and pushed the load towards the collection point.
It was his third offence.
The writer can be reached at [email protected]
