Not easy; this English..!

MANY call centres abroad are replacing their foreign employees with local ones because some of them cannot be understood. “We’re getting more complaints from folks who say they can’t understand customer service people, with the language barrier,” says a Senator.
Well I don’t think it’s only the Indians who’ve had problems being understood: Shortly after Charles de Gaulle left the Presidency of France in 1968, Harold Macmillan, the ex Prime Minister of Britain invited the General and Madam de Gaulle to join Lady Macmillan and himself for dinner at a restaurant in Paris.
During the dinner, Macmillan turned to Madam de Gaulle and said, “Now that the General has retired, what gives you the greatest satisfaction?” To his astonishment Madam de Gaulle replied; “ A penis!” Macmillan was shocked to hear this from this old lady who was supposedly very pious and went to church everyday.
Then a laughing De Gaulle interrupted: “Harold, you have misunderstood Madam de Gaulle’s faulty pronunciation of the English word ‘happiness’. Needless to say, there was relief on the faces of all present.
Very often the English and Americans don’t agree as was the case when General Eisenhower and Field Marshall Montgomery were once discussing ‘English’ as she is spoken in England and across the Atlantic.
“I guess there’s nothing wrong with our English?” said Eisenhower. “Nonsense!” said Monty, “You Americans can’t even pronounce the language. Can you tell me Eisenhower, what excuse there can be for pronouncing schedule as skedule?” “Well,” replied Ike, “that’s the way I was taught to say it in ‘school” And sometimes English is even confusing to the natives as well as this notice that was put up on a bulletin board in a church in England: “This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends!”
And this one is even more hilarious: “On Wednesday, the Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs Johnson will sing, ‘Put Me In My Little Bed,’ accompanied by the priest!” So my dear Americans it’s not just the poor Indian’s English which is being misunderstood, but even yours when you speak to the rest of the world..!
—Email: bobsbanter@gmail.com

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