Choosing friends..!
Robert Clements
Friday, June 10, 2011 - Poor Karuna, on his 88th birthday, with his own favorite daughter and a close party minister in Tihar Jail, and after losing an election, he finds out the hard truth, that the company he kept led him to big trouble.
As the old adage says, “A Man is known by the company he keeps” and so it is prudent to choose your friends wisely. Nearly twenty five years ago, I chose a wrong friend: He was a tough fellow from the Punjab, and since I was also running my own business, I had to drive around a lot in my little Maruti, which had just come into the market. This young, muscular fellow, sat by my side and came along with me to all my worksites.
I realized I enjoyed having somebody like him in my car. In any altercation with a fellow motorist, be it a car driver or truckman, he never talked, he just used his fists, and I marveled at the way people ran from him after just one blow.
It was a late night phone call, from the police that woke me out of my reverie; he had landed in jail, after bashing up a cyclist. I went over and pulled him out, but started realizing that I would have to get out of this friendship. And I did, but not before it had ruined quite a bit of my own reputation.
From that day I’ve tried to be careful over those I choose to be friends with and have worked out some rules I follow: The first thing I check nowadays is the person’s sense of honesty: Not just with money, but with his family. I do have friends, both men and women who cheat on their spouses, but in their guilt and pain, I see honesty. Secondly I look for baggage: Yes, hates and jealousies from childhood, which manifest in sometimes erratic behavior. Suddenly someone you have met and are beginning to like acts strangely when confronted with a problem or challenge. I see this often with women when talking of a pretty woman. We all have some stuff we carry from our past, but it is important to see that these things don’t mess up the present.
Thirdly I avoid those who are intolerant of another’s faith, caste or race. This comes out through jokes, or hateful talk. I know that same person waxing eloquent about another of another faith would do the same about me if given the opportunity. I avoid them like the plague. There are many more rules you could follow, and if Karuna had been a little careful too, he would have celebrated a happier birthday..!
—Email:bobsbanter@gmail.com
As the old adage says, “A Man is known by the company he keeps” and so it is prudent to choose your friends wisely. Nearly twenty five years ago, I chose a wrong friend: He was a tough fellow from the Punjab, and since I was also running my own business, I had to drive around a lot in my little Maruti, which had just come into the market. This young, muscular fellow, sat by my side and came along with me to all my worksites.
I realized I enjoyed having somebody like him in my car. In any altercation with a fellow motorist, be it a car driver or truckman, he never talked, he just used his fists, and I marveled at the way people ran from him after just one blow.
It was a late night phone call, from the police that woke me out of my reverie; he had landed in jail, after bashing up a cyclist. I went over and pulled him out, but started realizing that I would have to get out of this friendship. And I did, but not before it had ruined quite a bit of my own reputation.
From that day I’ve tried to be careful over those I choose to be friends with and have worked out some rules I follow: The first thing I check nowadays is the person’s sense of honesty: Not just with money, but with his family. I do have friends, both men and women who cheat on their spouses, but in their guilt and pain, I see honesty. Secondly I look for baggage: Yes, hates and jealousies from childhood, which manifest in sometimes erratic behavior. Suddenly someone you have met and are beginning to like acts strangely when confronted with a problem or challenge. I see this often with women when talking of a pretty woman. We all have some stuff we carry from our past, but it is important to see that these things don’t mess up the present.
Thirdly I avoid those who are intolerant of another’s faith, caste or race. This comes out through jokes, or hateful talk. I know that same person waxing eloquent about another of another faith would do the same about me if given the opportunity. I avoid them like the plague. There are many more rules you could follow, and if Karuna had been a little careful too, he would have celebrated a happier birthday..!
—Email:bobsbanter@gmail.com
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