Only one slap..!
Robert Clements
Monday, December 05, 2011 - Gandhian sir! Gandhian sir! Indian Agriculture Minister Sharad Pawar has been slapped on the face!” “Only one slap? Ha, ha, ha! Only one slap?” “Gandhian sir you are smiling?” “Yes, yes, this is my smiling face! The other face without a smile is wax model they have made of me. But this is my smiling face!” “Why are you smiling Gandhian sir?” “Because of good news you have brought me. He, he, he!” “You are giggling sir!” “Ha, ha, ha!” “You are laughing sir!” “He got only one slap?” “Yes Gandhian sir!” “But remember, I gave first slap!” “You slapped Sharad Pawar sir?”
“Not Pawar. Arrey, I slap government! Such a slap it was I gave them, right there in that Ramlila Maidan when I went on fast. Phatak! Phatak! What a slap! Who is that? Who are all those people with pens and mikes?”
“They are press people Gandhian sir!” “What you want, why you come here?” “Sir, we are press people. You know Sharad Pawar got one slap? Now people very hurt!” ”Why, because that sardar gave only one slap?” “No sir!” “Then why people hurt?” “Because people hear that you said, ‘only one slap!”
“So people are hurt?” “Because you are a Gandhian sir. Gandhian don’t believe in violence!” “Yes sir, press people are right sir, it is in page forty three of Gandhi book, it say that Gandhian don’t believe in violence! You will have to do something sir, otherwise people will think you are not Gandhian sir!” “I did not read page forty-three! Where is my Team? Team! Team! Come here immediately. I need clever advice quickly, before people think I am not Gandhian!”
And so it was the next day that the so called Gandhian who found out, albeit a little late, that our great Mahatma would have wept at the thought of a minister being slapped, issued another statement. “Press people! Press people please come here!”
“You have something to say, oh Gandhian sir?” “Yes, yes, what I meant by ‘only one slap’ was whether the dastardly attacker had stopped with one slap, or done even more harm to my dear friend Pawar! I am a Gandhian I condemn violence!” “Yes Gandhian sir, we will retract your statement, your smile, your laugh and your giggle..!”
—Email:bobsbanter@gmail.com
“Not Pawar. Arrey, I slap government! Such a slap it was I gave them, right there in that Ramlila Maidan when I went on fast. Phatak! Phatak! What a slap! Who is that? Who are all those people with pens and mikes?”
“They are press people Gandhian sir!” “What you want, why you come here?” “Sir, we are press people. You know Sharad Pawar got one slap? Now people very hurt!” ”Why, because that sardar gave only one slap?” “No sir!” “Then why people hurt?” “Because people hear that you said, ‘only one slap!”
“So people are hurt?” “Because you are a Gandhian sir. Gandhian don’t believe in violence!” “Yes sir, press people are right sir, it is in page forty three of Gandhi book, it say that Gandhian don’t believe in violence! You will have to do something sir, otherwise people will think you are not Gandhian sir!” “I did not read page forty-three! Where is my Team? Team! Team! Come here immediately. I need clever advice quickly, before people think I am not Gandhian!”
And so it was the next day that the so called Gandhian who found out, albeit a little late, that our great Mahatma would have wept at the thought of a minister being slapped, issued another statement. “Press people! Press people please come here!”
“You have something to say, oh Gandhian sir?” “Yes, yes, what I meant by ‘only one slap’ was whether the dastardly attacker had stopped with one slap, or done even more harm to my dear friend Pawar! I am a Gandhian I condemn violence!” “Yes Gandhian sir, we will retract your statement, your smile, your laugh and your giggle..!”
—Email:bobsbanter@gmail.com
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