College for begging..!


YOU must be joking,” I said looking at the bald, long bearded unkept professor who was sitting along with me in a college library, how can the university sanction funds to start a College for Begging?”
“We have to move with the times,” said the professor scratching his beard vigorously, “now the students should be taught courses which will enable them to earn a good living.”
“But begging!” I exclaimed. “How can we stoop so low.” “Begging is an art,” continued the professor, “which I know can make our students millionaires. In fact our idea is to have a basic diploma course, a degree course and also a post graduate one.” “I didn’t know there was so much to study about in begging,” I said. “In the basic course,” said the professor opening a brochure on the same subject, “we will teach street begging, door to door begging with practical training on professional limping and use of crutches.”
“What more is there to learn?” I asked. “I don’t think there’ll be anything left to teach in the degree course.” “Plenty,” said the professor pressing his stubby fingers on his bald heard. “Degree holders will get special voice training, and experts will train them in the use of facial expressions.”
“Voice training and facial expressions,” I said thoughtfully, “sound more like an acting course to me.” “Exactly,” said the professor, “a good beggar has to be an excellent actor. His face should invoke enough pity to make people part with their cash and his voice should be so well modulated that it should tug at their heart strings.”
“And do you think that many youngsters will enroll for this course?” I asked. “Our forms are already sold out,” said the professor delightedly. “Fathers are already willing to pay donations to enable their children to enroll.” “And what about your post graduation course?” I asked. I can’t imagine the beggar on the street being a post graduate.” “No, no, no,” said the professor. “This is not for the man on the street. This is a course which will teach our men to beg on the international scene!” “But why should we beg abroad,” I asked incredulously.
“But isn’t that what we are already doing,?” asked the professor, “from our grants to our loans, to their Rotary or their Lions, from their World Bank and the United Nations, we walk around with a hat in our hand.
This course will only make us better at the job. In fact I’m going to America next week to get donations to fund this college! Imaging what a rich nation our country is going to be !
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